Ha! Now here's something you don't get to see everyday:

I was driving back home from Mandaluyong City, and seeing that the SLEX was experiencing heavy traffic, I decided to do the BF Shortcut. After an agonizing 10 minutes trying to follow Paranaque's 2nd District Congressional Candidate Atty. Romy Roxas' motorcade (you will lose, bastard!), I was finally at the Aguirre Avenue entrance. No problems here, as the guard was busy exchanging saliva, I mean words, with his friend "Scooter Boy", and I thought I was already scot-free.

Wrong! There was heavy traffic at the Toyota entrance of BF, and I thought how it can be this heavy when it's only 9 am on a Saturday. The thought quickly subsided when I found out that the guards were actually busy pulling down the bars, and they actually pulled them when I tried to pass, sending me to a complete stop.

Here's the transcript of our conversation:

Guard: Homeowner po ba kayo?
Me: Hindi.
Guard: Kasi kelangan nyo kasi ng sticker dito eh. (points to front window where the sticker should be placed)
Me: Para saan, eh pinapasok nga ako.
Guard: Saang gate kayo pumasok?
Me: Sa Aguirre gate.
Guard: Kasi nga kelangan nyo kasi ng sticker sa BF.
Me: Bakit? Hindi na naman kelangan ng sticker dito ah, kaya nga ako nakapasok eh, kaya nga lalabas na ako eh.
Guard: Kasi para sa Paranaque yun, eto naman para sa Las Pinas.

And here is where my mind goes, "WTF????? This was all the heavy traffic was about?"

Me: Ano po bang sticker ng Las Pinas ang kelangan ko?
Guard: (doesn't answer my question) Sa susunod nalang kumuha kayo ng sticker para di na kayo maharangan.

I just stopped and agreed, because I really don't want the other 50 cars behind me to wait for another 10 minutes for my tirade. Read that folks, 50 cars! These guards were not even thinking about the commotion they're doing. And it's on a fricking Saturday morning!!

Shit-pickle!